I state we are all driven by our desires or our fears. Positively or negatively. In relationships, the same holds true and it’s explained and defined by our attachment styles. As a child you experienced attachment to others a certain way and this was your programming going forth for all relationships. Friends, this is immensely significant. You can quickly find out your attachment style and open a whole new world of understanding and opportunity for your life, from relationships to how you work to how you perceive your spirituality. I sat down for a long talk with Thais Gibson. Thais has become the authority on attachment theory and styles. She has a Ph.D. with nearly a decade of experience running a successful private practice and engaging with over 30,000 clients through individual sessions, workshops, and an educational platform. She created the Gibson Integrated Attachment Theory™, which unites traditional attachment theory, developmental psychology insights, and potent subconscious reprogramming techniques that are woven throughout the course material within The Personal Development School. Thais founded the Personal Development School when her private practice got fully booked with a 2-year waitlist. It quickly expanded to thousands of members and counting in 115 countries. The school has over 38 million views on social media. I encourage you to go to personaldevelopmentschool.com now and take the free Attachment Style quiz. If you want to join the membership and gain access to her courses, use code Kevin25 and get 25% off. You might want to take the quick quiz before you listen to this so you can have a better understanding.

Ryan Serhant is one of the most successful and well-known real estate brokers in the world. Ryan is known as a star of Bravo’s Emmy-nominated Million Dollar Listing New York, its spin-off show Sell It Like Serhant, and for his appearance in the film While We’re Young alongside Ben Stiller, Naomi Watts, and Adam Driver. He founded his own real estate company, SERHANT., that has grown to more than 300 agents and over 100 full-time employees across New York City, Long Island, the Hamptons, and Florida and has amassed over 6 million followers across all social platforms. If you remember the old TV show, Lifestyles of The Rich & Famous, Ryan is the guy that’s gotten famous selling those houses, and living that lifestyle. He’s the guy everyone would point to and say is Mr Driven. Like he got a supernatural dose of drive and everyone else pales in comparison. And that is why I sat down to talk with him. I wanted to uncover what made him tick, and how he’s a mere mortal like the rest of us. So you’ll hear what drove him as a kid, where he went wrong, and why today he wants to become the most well known name in real estate in the world, simply because he wants the challenge and is bored otherwise. The other half of this conversation is about branding. Ryan got to where he is by becoming an expert in branding. He has a new book titled, Brand It Like Serhant: Stand Out From the Crowd, Build Your Following, and Earn More Money. I dug deep into his 3 keys of branding, which are 1) Discover Your Core Identity, 2) Consistency Is Key, with a focus on social media, and 3) Shout It from the Mountaintop, or rather, how to. It’s incredible information that Ryan has proven. He even went so far as to look at my social media and website and give candid, constructive criticism.

I’m back with authentic leadership expert Kristen Hadeed to talk about what drives her as she influences other leaders around the world. Kristen is a prolific speaker and personality people in key leadership roles are turning to for advice on how to lead by connecting with your people, whether they are your kids or your employees or coworkers. Kristen’s book is Permission To Screw Up: How I Learned to Lead by Doing (Almost) Everything Wrong. We discuss her newfound desire to pursue her spirituality, how she works to maintain relationships while traveling, I turn her own question on her of "What's something I would never know about you if we didn't have this conversation," and she turns it back on me as well. We cover her practices of walking, journaling and why she gets consistent therapy. And Kristen speaks to her journey away from everything having to be bigger and bigger and stepping back to pursue the quality of life, relationships and fun that she values. At the end I encourage her to pursue her idea of maybe gardening, and doing it poorly.

The fact you are listening to this podcast tells me you are driven to influence others, and influence is leadership. So whether you want to positively influence your kids or friends or coworkers, or you want to lead a company or organization, you need some leadership skills. However, the term of leadership covers a lot of ground and has a lot of baggage that may not be relevant for you. Which is why I’m doing this series on Authentic Leadership and I’ve brought in Kristen Hadeed. Kristen Hadeed has a great story of unintentional leadership that now has her on stage around the world teaching other leaders what she calls, human leadership. Which I’d say is leading while being a good and serving human. Kristen was in college and started cleaning people’s homes to generate some income. She got more requests and ended up hiring people to help and from it and ultimately created a company that cleaned student apartments and dorms, staffed only by students. But she made so, so many mistakes that helped her learn how to really lead people by connecting to and caring about them. Kristen’s book is titled Permission To Screw Up: How I Learned to Lead by Doing (Almost) Everything Wrong. It’s a wonderful book, which is why Simon Sinek wrote the forward. In this show Kristen and I discuss what authentic leadership is and can be.

I’m back with Pulitzer prize-winning reporter, CHARLES DUHIGG, author of the landmark bestseller and my favorite resource on habits, The Power of Habit which spent three years on the New York Times bestseller list. His new book Supercommunicators: How To Unlock The Secret Language of Connection which we discussed in the previous episode. Here we go behind the scenes with my What Drives You episode to find out what drives Charles in the key areas of life. To hear what he values and how he strives to walk this out in his habits. As the guy who wrote The Power of Habit, I expect to learn some new things. And to also find out how becoming a supercommunicator has influenced his life. Find Charles’ new book, Supercommunicators, anywhere, and connect with him at charlesduhigg.com

Here in America we are massively overfed, and often undernourished. Likewise we are in an age of dramatic overcommunication, and under-connection. And here lies the opportunity. This is the superpower. To evolve past mere communication and get to connection. This is where the magic happens. If you can connect, you can influence. And you’re about to learn that you in fact, don’t know how to really connect. Or at least, you can do it better and more consistently. My expert for the series is Charles Duhigg. I got to know Charles intimately on a beach in Florida, nearly a decade ago. He wasn’t there, as I was on a getaway with my wife and I was devouring his book, The Power of Habit. I have it right here, marked up and tattered. Still my favorite resource on habits. So when I got contacted by his agency about having him on the show, and that his focus this time was communication, I said schedule it. Immediately. And…he delivered. You’re about to hear how to do what few people do well, and you can make the change…immediately. And benefit…immediately. CHARLES DUHIGG is a Pulitzer prize-winning journalist and the author of The Power of Habit, which spent over three years on bestseller lists and has been translated into 40 languages, and Smarter Faster Better, also a bestseller. His newest book, Supercommunicators: How To Unlock The Secret Language of Connection, is available February, 2024. Charles writes for The New Yorker magazine and is a graduate of Yale University and the Harvard Business School. He has been a frequent contributor to CNBC, This American Life, NPR, PBS’s NewsHour and Frontline. The bio says you were also, for one terrifying day in 1999, a bike messenger in San Francisco. Connect with Charles at charlesduhigg.com/

This is my Big Idea & Action episode where I pull out the key highlights from our series on transforming conflict. Our catalyst was William Ury, one of the world’s best-known experts on negotiation, and the co-author of Getting to Yes, the world’s all-time bestselling book on the topic with more than 15 million copies sold. He’s a co-founder of Harvard’s Program on Negotiation and his brand new book and our muse for part one in this series, is, POSSIBLE: How We Survive (and Thrive) in an Age of Conflict. I also had a conversation in the previous episode with my co-host and brother, Jared Angaza who has served domestically and overseas as a conflict negotiator. It was in the conversation I had an epiphany, which I’m about to share in what turned out to be seven key highlights that stood out to me.

We continue our series on transforming conflict which we began with William Ury. William, one of the world’s best-known experts on negotiation, and the co-author of Getting to Yes, the world’s all-time bestselling book on the topic with more than 15 million copies sold. He’s a co-founder of Harvard’s Program on Negotiation and his brand new book and our muse for part one in this series, is, POSSIBLE: How We Survive (and Thrive) in an Age of Conflict. Here I’ve brought my brother, Jared Angaza onto the show, as he’s served many organizations stateside and in Africa on this topic negotiation, or more so…conflict resolution. Walk with us as we dig further into the issue.

We’re back with negotiation, conflict, and possibilities expert William Ury. In our previous discussion we dove deep into the focus of his new book, POSSIBLE: How We Survive (and Thrive) in an Age of Conflict. Here we go behind the scenes to hear what drives William in his personal and professional life, and how he handles conflict and pursues possibilities in his own world, from where he goes out around the globe to lead others. William again is co-author of Getting to Yes, a co-founder of Harvard’s Program on Negotiation and consultant to the White House, the State Department, and the Pentagon and more.